A Million Little Pieces Of My Mind

I just got back from my first appointment with my new environmental medicine doctor. The goal: To begin tallying my toxic load, and determine how to reduce it for weight loss and improved health and energy.

As I've mentioned previously, I have been visiting a clinic run by the Southwest College of Naturopathic Medicine in Tempe. It's actually a coincidence that SCNM is also the medical school Michael is attending for his doctorate in naturopathic medicine, since I began coming here before Michael chose a medical school. But it's very convenient that it is, because now I get a significant discount on visits. And my insurance doesn't cover naturopathic medicine. The AMA, run by conventional ("allopathic") doctors, won't allow it—naturopathic medicine actually cures people, rather than treating them for years and years and years.

Now, since this is a school-run clinic, I am seen by 4th-year student doctors, under the watchful eye of a licensed naturopathic physician. And since today was my initial visit with the students of Dr. Walter Crinnion, whose specialty is environmental medicine, I met with three students for my intake visit.

They were: Doug, thin and dark-haired; Alanna, a curly-haired blonde, and John, a red-headed, bearded cub. All three seemed sharp; and though Doug led the session, the other two didn't hesitate to contribute to the process.

Dr. Crinnion himself came in during the visit, looking exactly like the picture on his book. I complimented him on his writing, then felt compelled to add that I, also, am a writer, so he would appreciate that a compliment from me was worth more than one from a regular person, you know, one who was not a writer.

After introductions were complete, we began by going over the environmental toxic exposure questionnaire I had downloaded and been told to fill out beforehand. (You should check out this form; it contains questions that will make you see your life experiences in a new way, such as Have you ever been exposed to chemicals or toxic metals in the course of work or schooling? When? How long? Name them.) Doug seemed impressed, if a little disappointed, that I had actually done my homework.

The three then agreed that I would need five tests to determine exactly to which toxins I had been exposed. These tests ain't cheap, and, as I said, insurance won't cover them. So we agreed I would spread them out. I took the first test before leaving, a test for absorbed pesticides, which I am sure to "pass" because I spent two years as an actual pest control technician back in 1973-1974. Not only that, but as a teenager in Florida, I used to join the other kids in following the DDT mosquito-control truck on my bicycle. (Remember, toxins are stored in body fat and don't leave of their own volition.) This was a simple blood test, and cost $205, which was not discounted. (Lab tests are full price for everyone.) The results will not be in for three weeks, however.

The next test will be performed Wednesday, and is more elaborate; it checks for heavy metals. The list of heavy metals includes mercury, lead, aluminum, antimony, arsenic, bismuth, cadmium, chromium, cobalt, copper, silver, zinc and tin. He doesn't know it yet, but Sean, the student doc I've been seeing for acupuncture sessions, will be performing this test.

I'll keep you posted!